Key Points For Success - Excerpt from: Hooked But
Not Helpless
By: Patricia Allison with Jack Host From: demelza on 1/25/99
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Find A Stop Smoking Program: A stop smoking class will give you a
specific day to stop and the support of a group. Keeping in mind what
you've learned in this book, use only the information in the program
that seems logical, ignore the rest.
Do Not Try To Get Rid Of Desires To Smoke: The discomfort of wanting to
smoke is temporary and will get rid of itself. When you have a desire
to smoke work through the five steps (listed below).
Do Not Substitute Food: If you "smoke" food whenever you have a desire
for a cigarette, you will not only gain weight, you will never break
your addiction. Desires to smoke will continue to nag you until you
finally break down and give in.
Stay Clear Of Feelings Of Deprivation: Telling yourself you can't smoke
is a lie and will make you feel so miserable you will run back to
smoking. Remember that you can smoke. You just can't do it the way
you'd like to: now and then or without damaging your health.
Give Up The Illusion Of Having "Just One": One puff or one cigarette
has never been enough for you and never will be enough. It will
inevitably take you back to smoking your normal amount. The crux of
beating a drug addiction is knowing this: it is the first one that does
you in.
Choose Between Real Options: The only real options you have are these:
going back to smoking with all the terrible consequences or staying off
smoking with the many benefits. You don't have to like this reality,
but you better accept it.
Focus On Benefits - Continually: Keep in mind the specific benefits you
are gaining from being free from your addiction. Counter your
compulsion to smoke by remembering what you want more: your breathing,
your freedom, and your peace of mind.
Get Smart About Junkie Thinking: Every time you have a junkie thought,
identify it and talk back to it. If you do, these irrational thoughts
and plans will eventually lose their power over you.
Take Time Out When You Have A Desire To Smoke: During withdrawal or in
any high risk situation, get away by yourself for a few minutes to
review the five steps (listed below) and get your thinking back on
track.
Be Uncomfortable - Graciously, And On Purpose: The discomfort caused by
wanting to smoke is temporary and harmless, and it's your means to
escape from slavery. The desire to smoke will gradually become less
intense and less frequent until most of the time you will feel like a
non-smoker.
Prepare For High-risk Situations: Most people who relapse do so within
the first three months because they are not prepared for such things as
traveling or emotional upsets. Stay alert and beware of overconfidence.
You Don't Have To Change Your Life: Drinking coffee, having a glass of
wine or eating spicy foods will not make you smoke. They can make you
want to smoke. So your job is to treat the desires to smoke rather than
avoid them. Change your thinking, not your daily activities.
Use Dreams Constructively: Dreams about smoking are very common and do
not mean you are doomed to relapse. The anxiety you feel in a dream
when you realize you're smoking will teach you that, although you can
smoke, you will never be happy with it.
Remember, There's No Cure For Addiction: You will never be a
non-smoker. A non-smoker is someone who has never had a problem with
smoking, has never struggled to take control of that problem, and never
has worry about losing control. You're an ex-smoker, and although you
can be a confident and relaxed ex-smoker, you are always susceptible to
relapse.
Expect To Have A Three-month Flare Up: Many ex-smokers relapse toward
the end of the third month because their health has improved and the
side effects of smoking have disappeared. Don't imagine that time has
cured your addiction. One puff and you will be back to smoking
compulsively.
Do Not Nag Or Preach At Other Smokers: You're only one puff away from a
pack a day yourself. Take care of your own recovery and watch out for
the influence of other smokers around you. Don't glamorize smoking:
remember what it was really like to have to smoke all day every day.
Get Extra Help If You Need It: Attend a self-help group or see a
counselor to worth through feelings you've been drugging away all these
years. Letting go of these feelings from the past and learning new ways
to cope with the present will help you become a happier, more
comfortable ex-smoker.
Confronting Your Addiction (Five Steps)
1. I Am Having A Desire To Smoke Right Now: Every time you have a desire
to smoke, face it. The desire is going to come over you whether you
like it or not. It's normal. That's what makes you a smoker. But you
don't have to be afraid of the desire. It's not bigger than you. It
can't hurt you. You don't have to get rid of it, hide from it, or
pretend it isn't there. Let it run its course. It will fade away. You
may worry that you'll never feel normal again. However, you can be
certain that as long as you don't give in to the addiction, your desire
to smoke will inevitable diminish, becoming less frequent and less
intense until most of the time you feel like a non-smoker. And although
you want a cigarette, remember what you don't want. You don't want to
get sick from smoking or to have to go on smoking for the rest of your
life.
I Can Smoke. I Am Not Deprived: Nobody's taking your cigarettes away
from you. You don't have to give up smoking, and even if you do stop,
you can go back to smoking any time you choose. What you can't be,
however, is a happy comfortable smoker.
2. One Puff And I'll Go Back To Smoking 30 To 40 Cigarettes A Day, Every
Day: Don't trick yourself into believing you can have just one puff
when the going gets difficult. Using your drug to get through
withdrawal from your drug doesn't make sense. One puff will always call
for another puff, and sooner or later you'll be back to smoking them
all.
3. Right Now I Have A Choice To Make For Myself: Either give in to this
temporary discomfort and go back to the constant misery of smoking, or
accept this temporary discomfort and walk through it for these benefits
4. ... Now ... list your own five benefits here.
For Example: better breathing no more chest pains healthier heart peace
of mind more self-respect
Name the five most important benefits for YOU, beginning with your top
priority. One way to make sure these are your reasons for stopping is
to ask yourself whether you're willingly accepting the discomfort of
going through withdrawal.
5. You only have the above two options ... so
now make your choice ...
At this moment I CHOOSE TO WILLINGLY ACCEPT THIS TEMPORARY DISCOMFORT because I want ________(fill in this blank with your reasons to quit)________!!
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Always end your thinking process by naming at least three major benefits. When you have a craving to smoke, don't let it make a fool of you. Use these FIVE STEPS, along with your list of benefits, every time the desire to smoke comes up.
Recognize what's happening: you're having a desire to smoke. And you can smoke; you're not deprived. Then, remind yourself that one puff will take you straight back to the slavery of smoking.
Finally, make your choice. Don't whine and complain because you can't have it your way - smoking without consequences. You have to pay a price; you can't have cigarettes and your health, too. Remember that you are choosing between TEMPORARY DISCOMFORT and ONGOING MISERY. You can succumb to your desire and give in to your addiction for relief from temporary stress OR you can resist the urge for the sake of long-term happiness and health.
By using these steps to face your addiction, you will train your mind to respond to the desire to smoke in a new you. Instead of automatically giving in to your desires, like a robot, you will confront the desire and make a choice.
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